J.K. Rowling: The Fringe Benefits of Failing

Second part of my post about "The Importance of Failure".

What is True Love?

I believe that this is one of the most asked questions we think about. And not to mention it is also one of those questions that have no answers to. When I asked friends what do they see in a guy, they tell me a list of things. Things along the lines of "funny, clever, good looking, cute, easy to hang out with, simple" and more adjectives. Don't get me wrong here, I feel the same way- I can list out all the qualities I want my boyfriend to have. - Tall - Smart - Understanding - Mature - Cute - Average Looking - Funny - Good Heart - Responsible - Older than me Yeah, those are the basics too. But when I reflect back on my other relationships, I realise that none of the guys I've been with has managed to fit the bill. Am I wrong? Are they wrong? Did I make the wrong choice? Was I too harsh in the qualities I want the guy to have? There has been so far, two guys that has somewhat managed to fit the bill- my first boyfriend and the current one (although the current one fits it most ^_^). Those two guys are the most important people in my life, at this point in time. But sadly, I have to admit that neither, would I ever classify as my "true love". So it all comes back to the same question again: what is true love? What's the definition? Well, for starters, my definition is: True love is someone that just naturally clicks with you- you don't need make-up, you don't need to dress up, you don't need to be fake, you don't need to be who you aren't. Of course though, definitions like True Love change over time (Time, after all, is known to erode things until they almost disappear). So who knows, maybe in 5 or 10 years I'll have a newer definition of true love but right now, that is my definition. What's yours?

The Importance of Failure

A lot of my friends hate failing. They hate failing because they dislike the feeling of it, because they're scared that they'll feel inferior to others that succeed and because they just don't want that failure tainting their page. Everyone hates the feeling of failing- I do too, as much as any human. But when you think about failing and you can smile at the sheer thought of it happening, when you think of your past failures (whether they were big or small) and you can smile and go, "I failed" and when you believe that failing is a good thing, that's when you know you're one step closer to maturity, adulthood and life morals. I dislike failing: but that is because of the culture and traditions that I was raised in. I'm Asian. Hence, my parents don't like failing (my mother especially). She likes to do things right the first time and she has imposed those values onto me and my younger sister. But I've grown away and out of her values. I'm a teenager now, I follow my own rules and my own rules only. I experiment with things that my parents would hate me doing (relationships, friendships, school) but who cares? I learnt long, long ago that at my age, or as a teenager/young adult, everything you do will fail at some point in time. Look at the statistics, relationships in high school don't last (at least the majority of them)- that's failing. Friendships in primary school and high school never last (majority of them once again)- that's failing. School grades go up and down depending on how much time and energy you put into it- that's half failing. There are so many things in life that we fail at doing. But humans are so up themselves. They're too self confident, too ignorant to understand that to fail isn't a burden, but it may be your asset and it would be an even bigger asset if you admitted your failure and confronted it, rather than hide or shy away from it. I reflect back on my relationships- I think about what I failed at doing, what I failed at making the relationship last. And now, in this relationship, I'm doing everything I can to stop myself from making the same mistakes (but that is easier said that done, regardless, it's better to be trying right?). I know that in the end, I will fail again but when I look at it, rather than thinking that I failed another relationship, lost another friendship, I think that I have gained some valuable experience and lessons from something I failed at doing. Because believe it or not, failing is more than just a feeling- it's an experience. An experience that makes you mature, it makes you think about life in a different point of view and it makes you become more self confident in yourself the next time you 'fail'. So stop thinking that failing is not allowed- it's more than allowed, it's encouraged even! Failing...

Definition of Love

To every person out there who has fallen in and out of love, whether with an opposite gender, a friend or family member.

Falling in love is the best remedy for a heartbreak/ache. Don't be afraid. The more you fall, the more you learn and the quicker you can pick yourself up. Life goes on and doesn't stop.

Fate or Free Will?

My Language Arts teacher at school gave me this journal prompt which we had to write for about 5-10 minutes.

"Do you think humans are subjected to Fate or Free Will? Or both? Explain."

Most of the class chose Free Will and a small minority of the class chose Fate. But I chose both.

I will just briefly explain my own answer.

I think it is both because it is the people around us that influence us. But that is fate that allows us to to meet the people that influence us not only in judgement, but also emotional, physical, socially but also mentally stability. But it is by our free will in which we chose whether or not we want to be influenced.

Life is not only about Fate and Destiny. It is also about crossroads and choices/decisions. Those are the essentials of life. Others may thing different but in the end, this post and this blog is all about my opinion, my thoughts.

Thank you.

People Come and Go

People around you come and go. Some times you need to stay away from emotional support on some people because one day, sadly, they will leave. Whether on good terms or on bad. And there is nothing we can do about them.